Love is a gift from up above.

Exactly a week after my 16th birthday, I am laying on my bed alone. I miss feeling wanted.

Laura has Matt and Toro wrapped around her finger and she doesn't want either of them. I don't want them either, but still, it'd be nice to have someone like me. It's ridiculous being jealous since Laura has always been happy for me, but I can't stop myself. I've never not been with Jose...or at least that's how it feels.

It's just been me and mom and grandma all week.

And I'm so sick, I just want Jose to make me feel better like he used to.

I don't even know that I want someone to necessarily want me in a girlfriend way. But just to want to talk to me. Matt just talks to me because he thinks he can get to Laura through me. That's pretty much where the list of people who talks to me ends. I'm lonely. I miss Stevie, he made me laugh and happy. We didn't ever have to be anything, but friends. I don't know why he ignores me now, but I wish he didn't. He was such a good friend.

I am so lonely.